Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Temper Sparkled: Still Seeing Cranberry Red

I'm not very tolerant of rude people. In fact I find impatient folks to be spoiled and uncivilized but this morning I personally felt more like a rhinoceros in public than a woman who just fixed her hair, brushed her teeth and applied an appropriate amount of makeup before risking her life to drive through the snow to get her nails done, professionally.

Rushing to my nail appointment, I desperately wanted to purchase a cup of black coffee. It was cold out, after all, and I hadn't eaten breakfast. Realizing that stopping for coffee would make me late, however, I headed straight for the nail spa. I'm always thinking of others that way -- putting other people's schedules ahead of mine.

Yesterday I had tried to walk into this same business but the manager advised he could not get me in; I needed to come back. Their next available appointment was for today. Thus -- I showed up for my appointment fully anticipating I would finally get my gawd-ugly broken nail fixed and . . . Other people WITHOUT appointments kept showing up. Unlike me, however, they were getting cared for -- ahead of me; even when I regularly patronize this spa and always tip at least $5 for my $20 service.

In fact, two separate women had walked into the waiting room where I sat without appointments and they were both provided with a pedicure or nail treatment right away. Me? I kept sitting there, feeling ignored.

It was a good thing my daughter-in-law Skye decided to go with me or I would have had nobody to talk to. Finally, an unfamiliar Asian female acknowledged us and Skye asked if she could possibly get a manicure at the same time (even while she did not have an appointment either).

The nail-tech said she could definitely fit Skye in. Then she sat both of us at separate empty stations and -- lo and behold - she started working on Skye; not me. 15 minutes later, while I continued to just sit there, watching everybody else get worked on (and with nobody to even take my pulse) I felt more and more angry.

What the hell? Am I invisible? Did I not make an appointment? Do I suddenly look hideous or have offensive breath? (I had been scheduled to get my nails done at least half-an-hour earlier!)

Any time I feel so disrespected or angry I look to the motivation for my feelings. After all, a psychic can be too easily swayed by the energies around her. A lone ghost can simply pass by and make me feel sad or lonely without me realizing what the emotion was all about. So I sat with that rage just building and realized that this anger really was just my own emotion.

I had an "expectation" of paying for professional services. I had waited for this appointment, with an ugly broken fingernail, for more than a day. I skipped my morning coffee to arrive on time. When I ran my metaphysical business I ALWAYS put the customer with an appointment ahead of walk-ins and I wanted the same courtesy to be shown to me. Because, as a customer, I always tipped well and thanked my manicurist, I felt I deserved better treatment than this!

Yet that's the trouble with "expectations." From the Buddhists, I have learned any time I allow myself to get emotionally involved with a particular outcome I set myself up for potential disappointment.

At the same time, watching Skye get her manicure -- listening to her giggle as they soaked her fingers in paraffin -- entertained and amused me but it also made me feel more cheated (as I sat there, feeling neglected).

Finally, I declared out loud to Skye that I was going to leave and go find another spa as soon as she was done. That's when a nail tech whom I had also never seen before finally offered to fix my broken nail. Thank gawd. She also did the usual high-quality work I had grown accustomed to.

Skye and I drove home safely through the snow and happily I survived the harrowing experience. My fingernails are now sparkly cranberry-red while Skye's are magical-purple, like Merlin's cape. We look utterly beautiful, the two of us.


Skuld said...

Sounds like an extremely frustrating situation. I am alot like you in that I bend over to make others happy or comfy and get a little bent when people are rude. I had a crazy situation at IHOP this weekend. We had no power due to the ice storm we had, and we were tired, starving, and cold. The line was out the door... I was gracious enough to let an elderly couple go ahead of us so thy could warm up. Then another couple cut in front of us shortly after... We ended up cutting back in line and I gave them both foul looks. I felt bad after, but couldn't understand their rude behavior!!!

SunTiger said...

Wow. I'm laughing after reading your comment. {Thank you for sharing.} Frustration is always best when shared in a manner that releases the steam in a healthy manner.

I'm actually glad you glared at those who cut in line. Perhaps they will pay more attention next time (and not be so mindlessly rude to such kind and courteous folks such as yourself).

Marcheline said...

SunTiger -

Rude people are everywhere. Think instead how blessed you are to have the extra money to spend on beautifying yourself in a salon!

- M


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